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Saturday, July 21, 2012

A simple plan.

When I was about 12 years old, I've made up a plan. 
A simple plan. A plan on how to take care of my mom. 

My dad's work last time (even now), made it impossible for him to stay at home 24/7. And there were several incidents that happened at home involving my mom, in which my father wasn't there, able to help. I don't blame him though. He left to work for our sake. So, in my mind, I've made up a well-made plan (or so I thought) on how to take care of my mom with my dad's frequent absence. 

I was 12 at that time. My sister was 15 whereas my brother was 17. 

My deduction was that; there are 3 years of difference between me and my sister and 2 years of gap between my sister and brother. So, there's like a 5 year gap between my brother and me. And the amount of time usually taken to study in Universities after SPM is about 4-5 years, or so that was what my mom said at that time. 

My naive mind didn't come up with any solutions if any obstacles were to come my way. I thought it was a solid plan.

What I've come up was that, when my brother have gone through his SPM, he'll be going to matrix and University or something, leaving me and my sis to take care of my mom. He'll enter University right after he gets his SPM results, so, he should be 18 at that moment. While my sis  with only one more year for SPM, and mine, 4 more years to go. 

And when my sister's turn comes next afterwards, I'll still have 2 more years to accompany my mom until it's my turn to go to University. At that time, my brother will have gone through 3 years in University already!

And when it's my turn to enter University and all, my brother will be done with his 5 year of study. Hence, he'll be able to stay at home with my mom and find a job around there. Resulting in, my mom never being left alone at home without anyone accompanying her. Yay!

However, my plan didn't worked out the way I wanted it to be. My brother did get a job, but it's no where near home. And my sister is just about to further Degree this Sunday at UniKL as well as I myself on this upcoming September the first at USM. Now, there aren't anybody to accompany her at all! I'm not really a Mama's girl but I do love my mother dearly. The thought of leaving her alone at home scares me more than my own upcoming journey to USM. It frightens me to think if something should ever happen to her at home, alone and I wasn't there. 

I may seem like I'm being overly paranoid, but can you blame me? 

There are news all over the place where old citizens are getting attacked for their belongings. At home, mall, work, etc. Even if it's not because of that, maybe she faints, or collapses, or slips and falls down, or something? How would I know? Nobody would know cause there's nobody around to help her. There are many possibilities, possibilities in which I never want for it to be true. People may say don't worry too much but what's not to worry? My mindset is that;

If it could happen to others, there is a chance that it can happen to me.
Good or bad.

I'm not saying to live in fear or anything, but to have this simple thought in mind and to be ready to face the unexpected whether they are good or bad. And at the same time, ask Allah to shelter us and our family from involving in any bad incidents or things which may lead us astray. Furthermore, since this is the month of Ramadhan, to all Muslims, this is the month of blessing, hence, we should try our best to use this month to our benefit! More Ibadah I mean asking help from Allah. Never be shy to ask anything from Allah as He is the Almighty and most Generous of all.

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